In the international community, it can be easy to dismiss goodbyes as old hat or just a routine to complete. Yet, every year, strong emotions erupt and can feel a bit out of blue... if you don't recognize and teach the five stages that David Pollock, the author of Third Culture Kids, calls the transition cycle:

1. Involvement. The first stage involves feeling settled and comfortable in a place that we know; we feel like we belong and know where we fit in. There may be some signs that moving may be on the horizon in a vague sense.
2. Leaving. The second stage is marked by the realization that we will be leaving our place of comfort. As we realize this, we may begin leaning away from our responsibilities, commitments and relationships. There are often mixed emotions during this stage. For example, we may feel both anxious about leaving and excited about moving to a new place.
3. Transition. This stage begins when we actually leave our place of comfort and ends when we make the conscious decision to settle into the new place. During this stage we may be confronted with chaos and stress.
4. Entering. This stage begins when we feel ready to become part of life in the new place. We begin to figure out how we should go about becoming accepted, start to reach out to others and take some risks.
5. Re-involvement. Finally, we reach the stage where we feel accepted in the new place. We begin to have the feeling that our presence matters and that we belong.

Not only the leaving students and their families (otherwise known in fancy terms as leavers), but those who remain behind (called stayers) are impacted by this cycle. Leavers are often most stressed in the second and third stages; stayers can be impacted most in the fourth stage when they realize the leavers really will not be returning.

Scroll down for ten ways that our school community has begun to acknowledge and support this process of transition.

As I settle into my new job at ASD, I have been so encouraged to find a comprehensive international school counseling program already in place. It is great to enter into a job with excellent programs and systems established. Now I have some work to do to develop further as a school counselor within these programs! We are being asked to create a professional growth & collaboration goal, so I have had the chance to sit down with a collaborative partner and discuss some areas where I could develop further. I feel fortunate to have time, collaborative staff, and PD opportunities dedicated to doing just that!

In the process, I have narrowed it down to two topics: child protection and Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (formerly known as collaborative problem solving). Regarding the former, the school counselors from preK- 12 have met for the past two years to examine current practices and ensure alignment of the curriculum across grade levels. I have joined the discussions and have been working to catch up with all of their hard work. I have also been selected to attend the AISA International Child Protection Symposium in Cape Town, South Africa in March 2015! I look forward to learning more about different aspects of child protection, but especially about research-based curriculum and its use with appropriate developmental levels. Oh, and for school counselors who are passionate about social justice and child protection… check out AISA's Child Protection Handbook!

I discovered that one of my fellow school counselors is a trainer for Collaborative & Proactive Solutions, and she is willing to mentor me as I learn more about the philosophy and techniques! I have been intrigued by Ross Greene's methods, as many counselors speak highly of its effectiveness. Collaborative and Proactive Solutions seeks to understand the child's need for skills rather than believing the child is willfully challenging adults and peers. I find the approach compassionate and affirming of the unique qualities each child holds. I hope to research CPS, integrate it into my current practices, and then assess the effectiveness in my own school setting. 

I feel blessed to be in a school that encourages us to grow professionally! I would love to hear about the topics and methods you, as a school counselors, are pursuing in your professional growth, too… comment below to share!

I was excited when the bulletin boards I'd ordered finally arrived and were mounted to the walls. I think it makes a huge difference in the windowless, florescent-lit space! This afternoon, I spent some time putting up butcher paper and borders, but I have yet to decide what exactly will go onto the boards! The purple board has a border with the continents (middle row of the last photo below) and the grey board has the multi-colored dots. I would like to post some of the postcards I have collected from around the world on the purple board, and I am considering a character traits theme for the dots board. Stay tuned for the final results!

UPDATE: September 18, 2014
Here is the most recent update to my office, which we will call the "after" photos (despite the fact that I probably won't be done with this office until, oh, mid-May…). First you can see the entrance to my office, with a welcome sign (but, alas, still no "where is Ms. G?" sign yet). Inside, you can see the front half of the room with table, chairs, and shelves for art supplies and games (and there is a small area with bean bags for a calming down space). In the other half, I have my desk area with reference books and curriculum hidden away. There is a small couch that is hidden from the door, making it a great spot for students, teachers, or parents to come in for a private chat. There is also more storage hidden away, for sensory materials as well as the odds and ends that all counselors need for the many roles we play.

For the new bulletin boards, I decided on themes of global citizenship and growth mindset. The purple board boasts some of the postcards from the many years I have been collecting postcards from everyone else's exotic adventures (and now- finally- I can buy some to represent my own travels!!!). It's already generated a lot of conversation with my well- traveled students and families!

For the growth mindset board, I used different colored circles to display fixed versus growth mindset examples. I hope to have students try their hand at creating some of their own examples during guidance lessons. Check out the original board at this blog.

Since then, I have added lamps to lessen the harsh nature of the fluorescent lights, and will one day add that locate-the-counselor sign. In the meantime, I am feeling more at home in my office. I was truly pleased to hear a student tell me the other day that he thought my office was comfortable and a good place to hang out in… worth all the effort, for sure!

Classroom Closure Lesson
As I've been wrapping up lessons in classrooms (grades 3-5), I have been using the crumpled heart metaphor. It's been a powerful lesson to end with, though you could easily use it mid-year during a unit on kindness or anti-bullying.

I started by having students each cut out a heart from a small red rectangle. Then, each student was asked to write four things:
1. your name
2. the name of someone important to you
3. an activity you enjoy
4. one word that best describes you

I talked with them about the importance of protecting our heart and sharing our information with people we trust. I showed them my own heart and gave examples of statements that could be made that would hurt my feelings, crumpling my example as I spoke (ex: If someone walked up to me and said "You like to read? Only nerds like to read!" My feelings might be hurt *crumple that section of the heart* and I might not want to read anymore. Or I would read, but keep it a secret...)

Perhaps the most powerful part was when I asked students to then crumple their own hearts- some students cried out in protest, others simply could not bring themselves to do it! We talked about why it was so hard, and how much words can hurt what we hold dear in our hearts. I walked up to several students and asked them about my heart, and they rushed to compliment or reassure me (without even prompting them!), which helped to "uncrumple" my heart. Students were then invited to walk around and say kind words that would uncrumple each other hearts. They loved this part!

At the very end of the lesson, we felt the softness of the wrinkled construction paper and discussed the term "soft hearted." We discussed how empathy ties into a soft heart, and how we can choose to speak kindness into others' hearts after our own hearts have been crumpled. It was a powerful way to end the year.

Small Group Closure Activity
For small groups in upper elementary, try completing a compliments mandala! Each group member draws a large circle and divides it into the number of people in the group (including me). Then each person writes their own name and a word that describes them (in case another group member is stuck- they can basically copy or do a slight variation). Pass the circles around, so each member can write their name and a compliment in a section of the mandala. Time given per person depends on the maturity level of students and how detailed you'd like them to be.  Students can keep the mandala as a reminder of the group experience.

Individual Session Closure Activity
With individual students, use a modified version of the feelings map. There is a wonderful worksheet on the Social Work Helper blog that you can download for free (check out the site, too)! It's a way to create some closure with students.

For this activity, I ask the student to complete a map that describes me, and I complete one for them. We brainstorm a list of words that could describe others. We write down 6 words that fit the other, then we color the map and discuss the time(s) we have met together. Then we trade the maps and share what we created. Students have the opportunity to remember the time spent together, and especially that they get to hear some of the qualities others see and appreciate in them. It's been a nice little warm fuzzy to wrap up individual sessions.

Some students need a little help with setting boundaries (if you're unfamiliar with the term, I highly recommend the Cloud & Townsend classic, Boundaries). It can be helpful to create a visual representation of appropriate and safe boundaries, so that students can better process when and where to share about themselves.

STEP ONE
The first step as a group is to draw circles. Use string and paper clips to try to help draw circles, or use other methods (see a video here). Then chose a color for each circle and shade in each corresponding section. This makes it easy to identify each field clearly.

STEP TWO
<-- Using this example, students  can write the names of people they know that fit each circle. The categories (from the center outward):
1. family and/or people you trust with secrets
2. friends
3. classmates, neighbors, teammates, etc
4. acquaintances, relatives, people you don't know well or do not trust
5. strangers, workers in stores, etc
Depending on student issues and developmental levels, you may need to adjust the language and details accordingly. I suggest that you have students write in pencil at this point.

STEP THREE
Once students have filled in their circles with names, pose a series of scenarios. They must determine with whom it would be most appropriate to share. 

A few examples (that can be adjusted for your group's needs):
Scenario 1
You have just received your test back from your teacher and you did not do as well as you had hoped. With whom would your share your disappointment?
Scenario 2
You just bought a new shirt (toy, video game, etc) and you really like it! Who can know this information?
Scenario 3
You have been having a medical issue (like lice, an allergic rash, etc) and someone asks you how you are. Who should you talk to about the details?
Scenario 4
You are excited about going to a game, show, event, etc. Who would like to hear all about the details of your part in it?

Allow students to talk about people they know and how the scenario could fit in their own lives. Also, suggest they move names to other circles if they find it necessary (i.e., a student may find that a person they had in a middle circle may need to move to a circle with more or less private information shared, based on how safe they feel with that particularly person). When they feel good about their circles, they can go over the names in marker.

COMING FULL CIRCLE...
I believe this activity to be useful. The act of visually placing names and discussing what is safe and appropriate to share can help students to reflect on their current behaviors without any uncomfortable confrontation. After the group, discussions with individuals about behaviors or boundary issues can refer to the circles as a visual reference, too. 

I have exciting news! I will be moving to another country to work at an international school! I will continue to work as an elementary school counselor. To learn more, click the picture to the left or follow this link (and please let me know if the link does not work!). 

I added a page to this website about international school counseling where I plan to post about counseling techniques and resources when working overseas. I also plan to post about my travels in this blog… so stay tuned!

So maybe you don't use Twitter… 

Maybe you even make fun of it? But it turns out to be a great way to connect with other elementary school counselors! We like to call it an online PLC. So join us! You know you want to...

In fact, I will be hosting a chat on Thurs, Feb 27, 2014 at 8EST/5PST. Use the ‪#‎escchat‬ in your tweets to discuss the topic: Using art therapy techniques in school counseling. If you decide to join us, take a few snapshots of student artwork to share! Hope to see your tweets there… ‪


…and if you missed the chat: read the Storify transcript!


It is easy to catch up on discussions held on Twitter to gain valuable information from elementary school counselors in the field. You can see all the tweets sent throughout the hour long chats. Each week, the chat covers a different topic, so you have the opportunity to read chats that interest you. 


Go to @carlicounsels Storify page to read transcripts of chats on a variety of topics! 

Go to Using art therapy techniques in school counseling to read last week's chat.


And join us every Thursday at 8EST/ 5PST for #escchat! You can see a list of upcoming topics and contact Carli Segal if you would like to host a chat.
 

During graduate school, I was both an intern at an elementary school and a clinical counselor at the university's counseling clinic. I was fortunate to be exposed to many different art therapy techniques; many of which I still use in my counseling practice at school. Since then, I have stumbled upon other activities I can recommend. Below are a few projects I have used, activities I would like to try, and links to art therapy blogs. 

The feelings map is one of my favorite techniques for students who have not yet mastered the identification of their own feelings. I fold a large sheet of white paper (12" x 18") so 1/4 of the sheet folds into the middle, leaving half. On the 1/4 flap, the student makes a list of 6-10 feelings words (I like to let them choose the feelings from an emotions poster). The student chooses a different color to represent each feeling and colors in a box next to the matching word. On the blank half, you have a choice: either the student can use the entire half to complete one large piece, or you can draw a grid of smaller squares (I like to make a 3x3 grid) and have students complete one square every time they visit for individual visits. If you choose to do the grid, students can visually see how their feelings have changed over time! You can also add the date for each square completed. On the inside flap- under the feelings "key"- I like to write some of the reasons students give for the bigger emotions they have experienced. Sometimes, students choose to draw pictures instead.  

When I was working with an adult client at the counseling clinic, I came to appreciate the art of mindful meditation. A supervisor shared a technique of observing one's feelings as clouds that you notice and observe floating or passing by. I have since used this with clients of all ages, and find that anxious students tend to find it the most useful. 

To add to this concept, students can make small 3-D clouds with string attached, write their feelings on the cloud, and watch the cloud float away (I hide it in a cupboard in my office, but you can always just walk away with the cloud for the student's visual memory). It can be helpful to hang the clouds in the office so students can "notice" the clouds whenever they visit (if your security alarm won't go off at night, of course!). Discussions can occur about how feelings can linger (i.e., storm clouds of anger that we feed, overcast clouds of enduring sadness), as well as what coping skills might be utilized to notice feelings without judgement and to encourage emotions to pass rather than linger.

The identity map is essentially a web with the student's name in the center, and various aspects of one's life radiating out: family, age, favorites, hobbies, friends, etc. 

I have read about identity maps as a tool that students can create completely on their own, but I have not done this yet. As I speak with a new student or one who may be seeing me individually, I either draw the map or have the student do it (depending on their age and ability). This helps me to get a better overall picture of the person with whom I am working. I also find that the visual focus and casual conversation centered on the student's every day life helps them to relax and build relationship with me as their counselor. Sometimes I ask what makes them most happy, sad, and frustrated, which can provide a great deal of information to me as the counselor. When I write the map, younger students often ask to add pictures to the map as we talk, which seems to bring further ownership to the process.

During my elementary internship, the first grade teacher team had students create self portraits of their face. Students were instructed to fold the page into eighths. The chin was drawn at the one quarter fold, the mouth at the half, and the eyes around the three quarter fold. Students could choose the colors and the background. As I walked past the results, I found some striking representations in the students' choices of color, sizes of features, and location of features. I have since used this with students in counseling sessions and continue to marvel at the conversations that ensue after completion of their art work.

Culled from the pages of Operation: Breaking the Boy Code, but can be used in individual counseling sessions, as well: create yourself as a superhero. Much like the miracle question ("If you woke up tomorrow and could change one thing about your life, what would you change?"), students love to answer what superhero power they would like to have. They like it even better when they can create an entire alter ego including costume, sidekick, evil they are fighting, transportation, and catch phrase! Given the chance to artistically render these ideas is all the more powerful for some students, and they are eager to consider how life would be were they to hold such power or control. In the end, some wonderful conversations can result about ways in which students can gain control over issues in which they were feeling powerless, where students might develop some of these desired traits in real life, and what it would feel like to help others who are less fortunate (especially for students who choose to fight bullies to help friends). Powerful stuff!

What can be truly underestimated? The opportunity to create art without directions, instructions, boundaries, etc. Some of the most profound moments with students have been when we have sat together at a table with art supplies of their choosing, creating and talking as we go. Students are often surprised at the stories that emerge through their drawings, and the pictures really can speak a thousand words to us as counselors... if we are only open to looking beneath the surface. 

My soapbox: we do not allow children nearly enough space, time, or opportunity to imagine and create. This may be one of the most therapeutic techniques we can offer as counselors.

I find it most successful when the counseling office has a wide variety of art materials readily on hand:
* crayons, colored pencils, markers, oil crayons
* a variety of magazines & print materials
* a variety of paper (weight, color, size, etc)
* a scrap bucket full of treasures
* yarn, string, beads
* glue, mod-podge, tape, 
* scissors (regular & craft styles)
* anything your crafty heart desires!

There are many more techniques I have yet to try, but am very much interested in (links attached):

• zentangles
• house/ tree/ person drawings
• mountains & valleys
• scribble drawings
• mandalas
• emotion color wheels
• map emotions on your body
• drawing friendships
• gratitude art/ journal

The gist:
While discussing individual counseling sessions on a Twitter #escchat (where counselors form all over the country gather to share ideas via tweets for one hour), the question came up regarding how students request to see the counselor. Last year I knew that I wanted to use a self-referral form similar to that of my internship supervisor's form. Yet I had no structured way to collect these forms other than teachers handing them to me when they could. Thus, I decided to try a more efficient system this year. 

The box:
This year, I purchased a drop box that was attached to the wall near the library, a central location that nearly every student passes by daily. This box is the perfect size, affordable (very important to counselors on a budget!) and has a convenient slot in the back to hold blank forms and pens. Students tell me they like using it because it feels like they are passing me a secret note… which makes the process fun, too! I like it because it teaches students to be aware that it may take a day or two before I can meet with them, and it is locked to ensure confidentiality.

The form:
The form incorporate Kelso's choices and big versus small problems, which (hopefully) encourages students to try to solve a problem on their own first. When I meet with students from these self-referrals, I always go over the attempts they made to solve the problem and use it as a teachable moment (either how they could try next time and/or affirming their choice to seek a trusted adult). The student's description and the indicated level of urgency help me to prioritize sessions, as well. Here is the form I use currently:

What is your process for gathering student referrals?